18 Tips on How to Forgive Someone Who Hurt You Emotionally

How to forgive someone who hurt you emotionally? How to forgive those who offend us? Throughout our lives, we all have experienced the injustices and humiliations that have befallen us, and in general, the tendency is that those who have wronged us suffer, “an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth” as they say.

However, we should keep in mind that this law acts like a boomerang, causing great harm to ourselves as well. It is not fair for ourselves to stagnate in resentment and revenge, as this will prevent us from making forward progress.

Knowing How to forgive someone who hurt you emotionally” has many advantages. However, when someone has done you a lot of harm, it might be very difficult to forgive them. For this reason, with this article we want to show you How to forgive someone who hurt you emotionally, where you will find 18 effective tips.

Learn to Forgive Someone

To truly forgive someone, we must first define what forgiveness is. We must also define what it means to say “I forgive you” and how it benefits us. Forgiveness is the action of reacting to a damage that has been done to us, and forgetting the injustice that has happened to us, but above all, it implies a renunciation of revenge and resentment , where the person, despite everything, seeks what better for the other.

Knowing how to forgive consists in an attitude, a decision to let go of anger and resentment, to accept the damage of the past, and to look to the future. There are many benefits to forgiveness, including the peace it generates.

How to learn to forgive someone?

How do you learn to forgive someone? How do you learn to forgive and forget the past? In order to learn to forgive there are a number of attitudes that predispose the person to the freedom to forgive. The first tips for learning forgiveness are as follows:

1. Loving

It is normally difficult to love someone who has hurt us. It is necessary, first of all, to take a distance from the person, even internally, and to think about who he or she is today and what he or she has been through. People are to be loved as is, not for anything they do wrong, and a person can only live and develop fully when he/she is accepted for who they are. Not forgiving means not accepting the other person in its entirety and so destroying their identity.

2. Comprehension

As human beings, we must understand that we are all vulnerable , that we can all be weak. Forgiving implies the conviction that in every human being, behind any mistake, there is a vulnerable person with the ability to change. Forgiving includes believing in the other person’s ability to transform.

3. Generosity

Forgiving requires generosity, since the person does not expect anything in return for his forgiveness.

4. Humility

Learning to forgive involves being humble. In forgiveness, a “moral superiority” is not sought, it does not seek to humiliate the aggressor or dominate him morally. At the same time, reprimands should be avoided, as they indicate that it is impossible to forgive.

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How to Forgive Someone Who Hurt You Emotionally

How to Forgive Someone Who Hurt You Emotionally

You may be wondering how to forgive treason or how to forgive infidelity. We’ve seen behaviors that can bring us closer to forgiving from the heart and now we’d like to provide a set of tips on how to forgive a particular person, for example, your partner. Learning to forgive, how to forgive a friend, how to forgive a mother or how to forgive someone who has hurt you.

1. Recognize the harm

There are many people who, when they are hurt by someone important, hide their pain so that they do not feel it, for their own protection. These people suppress their freedom of being, because they do not express the pain they feel when someone has hurt them for being their own. We need to understand that when someone hurts us, it hurts us emotionally and only the act of facing the pain can make us feel good about ourselves.

2. Get rid of resentment

Anger creates the need for vengeance and vengeance keeps the wounds on us open. If we fall into the vicious cycle of resentment and revenge, our wounds will not heal and we will continue to suffer.

3. Remember the past

To think that time will heal our wounds can be our greatest evil. It doesn’t mean that with the passage of time, a person stops crying over a fact and stops constantly raising it in his memory, he has forgiven. We cannot sustain the loss. Forgiveness does not mean “making a clean slate”, but recognizing the injustice, redressing it and, as far as possible, repairing the damage done. Our memory cannot be calmed, no matter how much time passes while remembering the event, feelings of resentment arise in us.

4. See the whole person

Forgiveness is inconceivable if we think of the person who just hurt us. People are greater than our faults and all human beings are greater than our guilt. Therefore, in order to forgive, it is necessary to see the other in his full form as a human being.

5. Believe in the other

As we have pointed out the attitudes of being able to forgive, if we do not trust the ability of the other person to recognize the mistakes and change ourselves, we are prevented from being able to forgive by thinking so, that their actions cannot be changed.

6. Repentance is not a condition

Although it is appropriate for the aggressor to show repentance for the acts that have damaged us, to forgive it is not necessary to declare the guilt of the other , because we must recognize that people on many occasions, even and do wrong, can have blocks or defense mechanisms that prevent them from being able to recognize their guilt.

7. Learn to listen

In many cases, when someone hurts us, we close ourselves and do not open our eyes and hearts to what they want to tell us. In order to forgive we must know both the motives and the reasons for our anger, as well as the arguments of the other. It is important to place ourselves in the other person and perhaps from the understanding of the other and empathy, we can forgive them. In this article you will find how to practice empathy.

8. Don’t expect anything in return

As we pointed out in the attitudes to forgive, a good advice is not to expect anything in exchange for your forgiveness. A sincere forgiveness does not wait for a condition.

One of the great challenges we face as human beings is to forgive ourselves. Forgiving yourself can be much more complex than forgiving another person, since you find yourself alone in the face of many emotions. How can we forgive ourselves? First, understanding that making mistakes is sometimes inevitable, and learning to forgive yourself is essential to learning from those mistakes. There are certain methods to work on forgiveness and forgive yourself, such as forgiveness therapy or writing a letter of forgiveness to yourself. One author who has written about self-forgiveness is Louise, author of several self-help books. Here are some tips to help you forgive yourself:

1. Respect yourself as a human being

Sometimes it seems that we tend to forget that we are human and as human beings we make mistakes, make mistakes and fail and not because of this, we should devalue ourselves.

2. Look for the bright side

Making mistakes is a natural human condition and is essential for human evolution. Allow yourself to make mistakes and imagine that your mistakes will let you learn from them and that you can do better.

3. Take responsibility

It is essential to forgive oneself to be aware of our responsibility for the facts. We must be aware of the part of responsibility that concerns us in the event of the event, since if we do not conceive our guilt, we will not be able to forgive ourselves, in the same way that if we think that we have a responsibility that is not, we can unfairly punish ourselves for a fault. that does not concern us.

4. Examine your emotions

We must recognize the emotions, feelings and / or thoughts that have led us to act as we have acted. A bad act can be caused by feelings of insecurity , fear or envy, for example, and if we do not understand the origin of our actions and we understand ourselves, we will not be able to forgive ourselves.

5. Don’t punish yourself

Punishment yourself will only lead you to blockade, will stop you from moving forward. Constantly killing ourselves for mistakes prevents us from seeing what we can do to prevent them from happening again. By punishing ourselves, we stop our own evolution. The best strategy is to apply compassion.

6. Overcoming

Once we understand why we made a mistake, what emotions and thoughts led us to it, we accepted what we did and we accepted responsibility for it. We should understand this, that this is not our fault that compliments us, but the way we face it.

This article is for informational purposes only. In this article we do not have the power to diagnose or prescribe treatment. We invite you to visit a psychiatrist to treat your specific case.

That’s all from our side about, How to Forgive Someone Who Hurt You Emotionally.

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